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The Coach House, Cross Hayes, Malmesbury SN169DF

Is that voice getting in the way?

Have you ever listened to that voice in your head? I mean really listened? That voice is constantly whispering and speaking to us, even when we don’t realise it. Now, that voice in your head should be your biggest cheerleader – telling you that anything is possible, supporting your dreams, celebrating your achievements and if that’s what your voice is doing, GREAT, but for many of us the opposite is happening.

When we listen to that voice, we can hear it telling us that we can’t do it, asking who we think we are, squashing our dreams, silencing our ideas, making us doubt ourselves and our abilities. That voice can keep us small and make us anxious.

It whispers away constantly, knocking our self believe and erasing our self esteem. It whispers while we are at work, playing with the kids and even when we’re asleep. It can leave us feeling hopeless and helpless and we have no idea why.

It’s all down to that voice.

You wouldn’t speak to other people the way that voice speaks to you and you wouldn’t let other people speak to you that way so why do we do it to ourselves.

It’s all down to fear.

That inner voice vocalises all our fears. The fears we keep buried deep down, the fears we didn’t even know we had, the worst case scenario fears, the ‘what if it doesn’t work’ fears.

And if we let it, that voice gives those fears power, so that they begin to grow and take over.


So, how do we stop it.

Firstly, it’s ok to be afraid. It might not work, it might go wrong, it might not be perfect and it’s ok to be a bit worried about that. What’s not ok is for those fears to stop you taking action. It’s about recognising those fears and doing it anyway.

Secondly, remember that you control that voice in your head. If it’s not supporting you, if it’s being mean and saying bad things you can choose to ignore it or change what it’s saying.

Try writing down your worries and fears – when you do this, they lose their power.

Try turning down the volume – just imagine you’ve got a big volume control and when you notice that voice saying something that isn’t kind or helpful, you can turn it down and enjoy the silence.

Try to retrain it. That voice really should be your biggest cheerleader and if it’s not then it’s time to retrain it. Try to notice the positives in everything, write down what you’re good at and where your strengths are and what things have gone well that day. The more positive things you fill your head with, the less space there is for that voice to criticise and belittle.

Speak to yourself like you would speak to someone you cared about.

You deserve to feel good about yourself and your dreams and if that voice in your head is getting in the way then it’s time to make a change.

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